Somewhere along the way, many forgot that patriotism belongs to all of us

I’ve found that people are surprised how deeply patriotic I am. Perhaps it's that I don’t adhere to either of the current parties that are offered. Perhaps it's that I am a feminist who wants equality for women. Or that I am an ally for those who love or identify differently than me. Though for me, those are some of the most patriotic parts of myself. Fighting for rights and stepping out of a box created to simplify and streamline thought. What’s more American than that?

But I think the real reason people are surprised at how much I love my country is because I am not religious. In America, we have come to this strange place where screaming out about God and Country is somehow a battle cry. But it isn’t really about “God”. It's about a very specific interpretation of “God” that fits a very specific idea of America. It’s become twisted and dark. Wielded by men who want to control and rule.

I used to be extremely religious. Living every rule. Church every Sunday. Every life step on cue. Any doubts were simply an indication that I was being deceived.

It took two decades of prayer and pondering to find my way out. Into a new place of spirituality without religion. During that time I was always patriotic. I was taught to love my country without question. Daughter and granddaughter of veterans.

I realized that I was able to connect to a higher power outside of those who would control me. Outside of those who defined “God” and taught me I was broken. Taught me shame. Taught me there was only one way to live. Taught me I needed their authority to connect to the divine. Took my money. Took my time. Forced me into a cave of thought, focusing on a warm bonfire that I was taught was the sun.

When I escaped that cave, I collapsed on a warm sunny beach, blinded by the sheer magnitude of ideas and thoughts I could explore. Once my eyes adjusted, I saw how many caves of thought surrounded me, and how many I had lived in. I saw that I had a very black and white understanding of my country. And I needed to start again.

I didn’t stop connecting with God because I escaped the organization that tried to control it. I didn’t stop loving my country because my eyes opened to those who were destroying it. It made me stronger in both. After leaving religion, my patriotism moved into a place of fervor.

I looked even more closely at my country, through fresher eyes. At its absolute natural beauty. The amazing experiment that it is. Revisiting the history of our ancestors building a new land. The melting pot of culture that has turned into something new and real. I learned more about the slaughter of civilizations that loved this land first and the crushing of their deep spiritual power and knowledge to replace it with another belief system. It is not a comfortable place to visit.

I do that because I am an American.

I linger on stories of those who fought to preserve our freedom. Grateful and humbled by their sacrifice. I look directly at the years of terror inflicted on our own people who were a different race and feel the horror of it. I mourn for it. I look for the prejudice that remains.

I do that because I am an American.

I feel my pride explode at the women who would not stay quiet. Because of them I can vote, own a business, wear pants, and publish this blog. I feel rage when I see those who would pull us backwards.

I feel that because I am an American.

I take walks in the mountains and bask in the stunning public land that is our greatest treasure, and I scream against those who want to take it for corporate gain. I enjoy the benefits of capitalism as I forge my way towards financial freedom. And I rage against the systems that allow a few men to control the majority of our resources. I rage that children are hungry when one man could feed them all. I rage that we have the resources for us all to be healthy, but powerful men have made agreements with insurance companies to keep us sick and bankrupt. All to make a few men rich.

I rage because I am a patriot.

There is something extremely powerful and painful about being raised in high demand religion and then seeing the cracks of control and lies.

It opens your eyes to see it all around you. Constructs created to mold you into submission. I didn’t “lose God”. I realized that a group of powerful people had taken “God” and held it ransom with threats of hell and damnation.

I looked around and saw God everywhere. Not the white guy in the sky I was taught to believe in. Something very different. Something I was not separate from. My world exploded with the pure joy and peace of it all. This was always mine. This was my birthright.

And I saw that same pattern of control in my country.

My ancestors trace back to the American revolutionary war. It doesn’t make me more American. But I have a lot of history with this country.

And my fury is real. I love this country so much that I rage against the people who are pulling us backwards. I am a patriot, so I rage against those who would tell a group of people they are wrong for who they love. I am deeply American, so I scream against inequality of wealth. I am an American so I fight against groups that would allow the government to control a woman's body. That kind of control over people’s lives doesn’t align with the freedom this country was built on.

Pulling myself out of controlled religion empowered me to pull myself out of the lie of what was contrived patriotism. I love my country too much to see it destroyed by movements that use religion and identity to justify control and exclusion. We are a melting pot of diversity and ideas. That is what makes us great. It is what has always made us great.

Somewhere along the way, a group claimed ownership of this country. Like one party, an ever changing party, gets to wrap themselves in the flag and decide what patriotism looks like.

This country does not belong to one party. It does not belong to one belief system. It does not belong to one version of “God.”

This country belongs to all of us.

Every one of us gets to question it. Every one of us gets to fight for what it should be.

That flag belongs to all of us. I wear it proudly.

There is nothing more American than questioning our government, especially when it is actively working against the greater good of all of us. ALL OF US.

There is nothing more spiritual than reclaiming your relationship with a higher purpose from people who claim ownership of it.

I am a patriot. I search for understanding through critical thinking. I fight against the suppression of freedom of ideas. I believe in freedom and justice for all. I know we are all created equal. I believe in the separation of church and state, and that all can worship, or not worship, as they see fit. For those that worship, their religious belief is deeply personal, and it doesn’t belong in government decisions for everyone else.

I believe in the constitution and fight against those who bend it for their power. I believe in the first amendment, so I write this post, even though some will be angry. I believe in the second amendment and own guns myself, and I believe we must do this safely and with sanity. I support our troops and am currently serving in an unpaid civilian position in the United States military. It is my honor to do so. I have a deep respect for those who have served and are currently serving. And I do not agree with everything our troops are asked to do. I am furious when lives are lost or freedoms repressed to support the grab for power.

I am proud to be an American. I am honored to be part of so much potential. So grateful that in the great lottery of life, this is my home. To be surrounded by so many kind humans. And I am disgusted at what so much of it has become in the path of control and hate. So I lift up the good, and I join the fight against the evil. There is nothing more American than that.